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Hey! Hey! Hey! BILL COSBY

It is always fun to turn on our hidden camera in the home of the last newspaper reader. But it seems like that old cadger knows where the camera lens is located. He seems to be working to the camera a bit. But his commentary on things like the weather, politics and the latest on the whole Bill Cosby crisis is priceless. And we mean priceless in that WHACKO-TV doesn’t pay him a dime. 

We were so poor we had dial-up!

There are some who say there is a link between poverty and mental illness. There are some who say that facing challenges in your early childhood makes you excel later in life. WHACKO-TV just launched a new reality TV series called WE WERE SO POOR WE… This show highlights people true-to-heart stories about when they were poor. Everything about this show is poor, including the ratings. 

BIG HOLE FOUND IN WEB SITE

WHACKO-TV presents another episode of its award winning travel series Video Travel Blog. This time the team took off to upstate New York to the Adirondack National Park the largest park and National Historic Landmark. Within the 6.1 million acres of land you can find WHITEFACE MOUNTAIN and the HIGH FALL GORGE. Our camera crew claims that, while they were there, they were abducted by a flying saucer. That’s what they told the State Police who found them walking aimlessly on a back road naked. They are currently in a holding cell in Lake Placid. 

ADD NEWS TAKES PLUNGE

WHACKO-TV’s Wolf Douglas is back from his long vacation and Cleveland Heights and ADD NEWS is back on the air. With the new ALS CHALLENGE going totally viral on the internet, Wolf was not to be outdone by some of those lame stream media germalists who are getting all the credit. So sit back and get your bucket of ice water ready, WHACKO-TV is in the game of giving. 

FOUR-LEGGED MOUNTAIN MENACE 

There is nothing like a beautiful garden to keep you happy about the birds and the bees. This is much better than what your parents told you. Our new garden correspondent Teabag Benny has put his political posters away for the summer and brings us a great report on how to deal with little four-legged friends. This is WHACKO-TV outdoors video that doesn’t need to be fertilized. It already smells. 

SUMMER SCARY AND SOME ARE NOT

Remember when you were young and all those scary movies came out and you were in the theater on Saturday and saw the previews for the new shows? From Frankenstein, to the Blob, to Rosemary’s Baby to Nightmare on Elm Street to Saw, there is a horrifying movie for every generation. Night of the living dead gave us zombies, Chuckie made us fearful of baby dolls and of course, Alfred Hitchcock made us afraid of taking showers. WHACKO-TV wasn’t about to be left in dark, we are afraid of the dark. So, we just released a brand new horror film that is sure to make you avoid the Internet. 

HAIL TO THE REDSKINS

The owner of the Washington Redskins has taken some real heat about the name of the team. And now, the United States Patent and Trademark Office decided that the name of the team is too offensive to be a trademark.  It’s not the offense they should be worried about, the team’s defense sucked last year as well. And everyone wants to know about the World Cup. Do the players really wear a cup in soccer?  And we cover cheerleaders as well. Whammy Douglas just can’t be beat, although the owner of the Redskins would like to. Ear Witness Sports is on the air. 

HEARTFELT ART

We asked all the major contributors here at WHACKO-TV to put together little vignettes on their fathers for Father’s Day. Chef DaWhite put together nice white wine vinaigrette, while our Arab camel guy Al Jazzera put together a power point of minarets. Does anyone read these memos we send out? The one that was so honest and touching was the tribute that Thaddeus T. Probinski gave us on his father. We had no idea that his father was a painter. To all those fathers out there, happy father’s day and to all you mothers, remember they like beer and football.

WHACKO-TV TAPPED FOR TV CAMPAIGN

We can’t tell you how excited we were when we were asked to participate in the new national TV campaign that YOUTUBE is doing to promote some of the bright young female stars on the Internet. We didn’t have the nerve to tell them that we were neither young nor female. So we worked all night on our submission and sent it to the home office of the tube of you. We don’t know when this will air on national TV, but the guy at the home office said, “Don’t hold your breath.” Wonder what he meant by that? 

EARTH WEEK RUNS OUT OF ENERGY

Wow, we are so pumped up here at WHACKO-TV. To celebrate Earth Week 2014, we have been recycling some old bits from the 50s and 60s. And we have been only eating biodegradable food. It’s been fun seeing how the whole staff (and the rod) pulled together to honor the earth in such a nice way. Wolf Douglas even cooked up this demonstration to prove how doomed we are as a planet. Do I smell EMMY? Are those biodegradable? 

ACADEMY AWARDS & MOVIE TRAILERS

With the Academy Awards show coming up this weekend, WHACKO-TV was excited to get a request from the Motion Theater Association to create a short trailer that would be played in local theaters before the previews and feature presentation. For the life of us we don’t understand why they rejected our attempt. After calling several times they told us it was too long. It’s only 1:22, WTF!


SUSHI in SOCHI

About ten years ago a lot of young YouTubers created web sites that propelled them to fame. One such web commentator was Phil DeFish-O, who according to Wikipedia is now worth $3.4 million. His observations have captivated millions of viewers each week and made him the darling of the web marketing agencies wanting to tap into the youth audience. Today, WHACKO-TV has gotten the exclusive rights to rebroadcast his antics on our channel. Hey if you can’t beat them, joint them, or at least attempt a reasonable parody. 

ACCIDENT WAITING TO HAPPEN

Beginning a new year, we see lots of advertisers trying to cash in on the mindset of a new year. Diet plans, Tax return preparation companies and the like. And the like what? We have no idea why people say that, but one of our faithful advertisers Wright, Wong and Facovia is back on the air. Their spokesperson Tony Facovia is always on his game. This time he takes a look at insurance rip-offs. 

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