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| Wolf Douglas - Journalist |
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Wolf Douglas comes to WHACKO-TV with a wealth of experience. He started out as a newspaper boy in Intercourse, Pennsylvania for the Intercourse Observer. After only two years on the Crime Beat, he was promoted to Editor-in-Chief. Then, he made the leap into TV as a street reporter for WOOD-TV covering Climax, Gay, and Hell, Michigan. WHACKO-TV hired him in 2007. Was promoted to News Dictator in 2010 when he took home the prestigious VIDDY for most forgettable news with ADD NEWS.
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THE REST OF THE WHACKO-TV TEAM OF CHARACTERS AND REPORTERS
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| Homeless Harry - Music Director |
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Homeless Harry
has a checkered past. He was found playing checkers one day in
Elmsford, New York near a dumpster. His amazing musical talents were
brought to light by Wolf Douglas during an episode of BACKLINE that
featured gifted-goofy people of the new millennium. Harry doesn't
remember his last name. But he has been cranking out the songs for WHACKO-TV, see them Here.
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| Lumberjack Bob - Literary Critic |
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Lumberjack Bob spends more time reading that doing anything else. He has been the WHACKO-TV book critic for years. He lives in a abandoned 1890s railroad car in the mountains of North Carolina and turns in about a report a month. His down-home-spun yarns about what he thinks the writer was trying to say are priceless. That's because we don't pay him. See all his reviews Here
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| Chef DaWhite - Food Expert |
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Chef DaWhite
loves to cook and his show COOKIN' WITH DA WHITE GUY has become
legendary with the men in the audience. When stationed in Bogota, Columbia, lots of locals where into
DaWhite stuff that he cooked up every night. We
brought him on. We just built him a brand new kitchen, so he better
stay. See all his work Click Here Dear
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| French Guy - International Reporter |
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The French Guy just joined WHACKO-TV when we opened our News Bureau in Paris, France.
His reportage reputation haunts him where ever he goes; Woman
scream, young kids cry, men smoke cigarettes. As the French say, "where do we sign to surrender?" Jean, Jean Paul, Jean Claude and Jeanee's work can be seen mostly right here.
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| Tony Facovia - Legal Expert |
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Tony Facovia
is more than an just your average run-of-the-mill attorney. Anthony
Facovia has more people in his pocket than anyone else in this town. Not
only has his law firm, WRIGHT, WONG & FACOVIA been supporters of
WHACKO-TV since our inception, but he has gotten us out of tons of
parking tickets and videos found Here.
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| Bart Finnster - Humane Resources |
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Bart Finnster
is the Humane Resource Director here at WHACKO-TV. Bart is one of the
first humans in the United States to get a degree in Sexual Harassment,
with a minor in Productive and Reproductive Management. Bart jokes often about all
the nut cases out there. Learn more about Bart right Here
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| Pecker Johnson - Techno Freak |
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Pecker Johnson
takes all the "jimbo-jambo" and the techno-talk and breaks it down for
all of us in his award winning, TECH-TALK program on WHACKO-TV. Pecker's
unusual name comes from taunting he received in trade school because of
his bright red beard (now a goatee). The kids thought he looked like a
woodpecker, but we know he is a bird of a different color. See his reports Here
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| Dr. Nancy Fingerman - Medical Expert |
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Dr. Nancy Fingerman is on-duty. WHACKO-TV found one of the smartest proctologists in America to be their medical expert. Not really that smart in certain areas, but always quick with an opinion on anything. Dr. Fingerman doesn't make house calls, but is on the Internet 24/7 right Here
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| Eduardo/Emilio - The Educator |
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Emilio a.k.a Eduardo attempts to educate anyone who will listen to this guy. His background is a bit unclear. He claims that he has a green card, but we have never seen it. We know that he has a file at the homeland security office, but we love what be brings to WHACKO-TV. Anyone can learn from The Educator.
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| Patrick The Pixie - Lucky Charmer |
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Patrick the Pixie
is well, we have no idea why he is here. Perhaps he is related to the
boss, the monkey, Mr. Thwig Salgoud, but up to this point, we have no
idea where he came from but once a year, Patrick and his pet frog LUCKY CHARM pass out some good Irish luck for all the viewers of WHACKO-TV. And it seems to work, check him out Here
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| Capt. Jack Jumpseat - Aviation Expert |
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Capt. Jack Jumpseat was tapped to be the face of our don't drink and drive initiative here at WHACKO-TV. He seems to have a knack for showing exactly what happens when you drink too much. With the news that real pilots have been arrested for being hammered, smashed, stoned, blotto'd, etc. Catch his antics.
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| Private Investigator Snarky - Private Dick |
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SNARKY was a perfect fit for WHACKO-TV. He really is our Mike Wallace. He jumps over the fence and finds the story within the story, the facts inside the lies, the truth embedded in the back side of the person trying to get away with something bad. His private detective skills are put to the test and he brings home the bacon, or the basil for veggie freaks watching.
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| Swammy Davis Jr. - Psychic of the Stars |
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Swammy Davis Jr. is the station psychic who can predict the future while living in the future. Swammy predict the demise of Osama Bin Laden on April 31, the day before he was actually found. He predicted that Republicans would not be very nice to Barack Obama. He is amazing.
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| TOTAL COMMANDER NIMROD - Space News |
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Total Commander Nimrod is the only legal alien we have on the station, because he is actually an alien from other world. He appears without warning to come to the station to do his version of the news. His flying saucer is quite the ride and he has been known to leave with one of our trusty interns. Hey, they wanted to see Mars. Nimrod is a special kind of news person who puts the E.T. in Extra Terrestrial.
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| Bobby Ganoosh - Pissed Off Person |
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Bobby Ganoosh is one of the people who tells it like it is. He is the definition of that old television maxim equal time given to responsible people. Well, forget about the "responsible" part, but this guy has a mouth like a drunkin' sailor in Norfolk, Vriginia. Bobby Ganoosh is the roving radical element who gets on TV much too often to be the head critic of all things. He is everywhere on WHACKO-TV. We are trying to get rid of him.
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